Wed 18 Jan 2006
How to Raise Your Own Tiny Writer (and I don’t mean the midget next door)
Posted by Michelle Klein under Children's Writing , Fiction , Parenting , Personal , WritingEDITOR’S NOTE: Well, what can I say about Michelle Klein? She is a roiling mass of intelligence, creativity and class, and her son is lucky to have her as a mother. Michelle has a couple of fantasy writing and gaming credits to her name, and she’s got an exciting comic book project in the works. Her strange attraction to Jaime Lannister (from George R.R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire series) nonwithstanding, we’re very pleased to have her contributing to The Bitter Quill.
Once upon a time there was a handsome prince who lived in a castle with his mother, the Lady of the Ink-Stained Hands. She posted her tale upon the Bitter Quill, and so it follows.
I’m getting to the point in my life where I can combine my greatest loves – literature and my child. I have the opportunity to watch him learn not only to read others’ words, but to tell his own stories and to come up with creative ideas. It’s fascinating to experience the fruits of a developing mind. Children have no boundaries. They don’t know all of the ‘rules’ that adults know – they don’t know they can’t fly or won’t be able to fly someday. They don’t know that they all won’t be rock stars or astronauts or firemen or presidents or monster-slaying heroes. Children are the most creative speculative fiction authors you’ll ever find.
So, how does one raise a writer? How does one encourage a child to tell the stories that live in his or her heart and mind? The stories are in there, even if the child can barely verbalize them. My father did it by telling me stories constantly. “When Daddy was a little girl and Mommy was a little boy and we rode on dinosaurs …” he would begin. He generated two results that way – one, I was always making up stories and either writing them down or telling them to the people around me, and two, I never believed that anything he said was true. The moon is not made of Gouda cheese and Prince Charming’s real name is not Irving Schwartz. How do I know? Mom told me.
When I wasn’t verifying things with Mom, however, I was writing. Stories, songs, poems, plays, journals. Now I’m starting to get my stories out into the world, but also I am telling them at home to my three year old son. It started as a method of parenting – it’s easier to get a reluctant child to do just about anything if you make up a story about it. If shampooing his hair will give him the magical powers to kill a dragon, suddenly he’s all for it, even if he normally despises getting his head wet. The more verbal he got, however, the more he asked me for “the story about the …”. At first he asked for stories I’d already told, then he’d just think of random objects and ask me to tell stories about them. An insistent three-year old demanding stories on the spot is a great stimulus for the creative process.
One day he asked me for “the story about the candle”. “I don’t know that one,” I said. “You tell it.” So he did. I had to prompt him with “then what happened?” a number of times, but he told his own story at three years old. He started it with ‘Once upon a time’ and ended it with ‘and they lived happily ever after. The End’. As much as I would like to chalk it up to the amazing prodigy that is my son, the truth is that all kids have the ability to write fiction and the more you encourage storytelling, the more they’ll do it. All they need is a listening ear and a sense of what a story is, which they’ll get from having stories told to them and read to them.
Read to them, tell them stories, ask them for the stories in their heads - that is my advice on the raising of writers. My own writing process currently is a dual exploration – my own creativity and my son’s. We inspire each other. We checked it out with Grandmom, so we know the moon is not made of Gouda cheese … but we pretend that it is anyway.
And they lived happily ever after. The end.
2 Responses to “How to Raise Your Own Tiny Writer (and I don’t mean the midget next door)”
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January 18th, 2006 at 6:18 am
My friend’s daughter is heading in that direction. It used to be the case that I’d have to provide half a dozen stories about princesses and dragons on visiting. Now she keeps on breaking in halfway through to explain how I got it wrong and what the _real_ story was. ;)
(I have also been doing a set of “Rose and the Wizard and their magic travelling box”, aka a thinly veiled rework of Doctor Who, but that’s quite another story . . . went down well, though.)
January 18th, 2006 at 3:25 pm
My sister credits me with her determination to encourage the creativity of her own daughter as much as she can.
Some of my earliest childhood memories involve proudly telling anyone who would listen that I wanted to grow up to be “a diamond ring” or a “giraffe.” I have no idea what my age was at the time of these proclamations. I remember my parents using the word “stupid” to describe my dreams, and telling me very logically that you have to be born a giraffe to grow up to be a giraffe, and diamond rings weren’t even alive. My older sister and brother naturally took my parents derision as an excuse to mock me endlessly. :P I remember feeling like an idiot; like I should have known better.
I’ve since developed a very rich fantasy life and considered it a very shameful, secretive thing. I used it as an escape and it became unhealthy. At one point it occurred to me that if my parents behavior throughout my childhood was consistent with those early memories, that could certainly explain the shame I’ve always felt over my imagination.
Anyway, I brought this up to my sister, years ago. Apparently, it made an impression. One of her first resolutions when she discovered she was going to be somebody’s mother was that she NOT be that kind of parent; that she not give her little girl any cause to feel ashamed over being herself.
Melanie is four years old now and it’s such a pleasure to watch them together. Melanie will start a song and insert random words into it. (”Ring around the rosie; pocket full of… LIONS!!!”) Every time she does, my sister will laugh and they’ll both exclaim over how silly that is. Then Melissa says something like, “What if you really could put a lion in your pocket? What would that be like?” A wonderful interaction will ensue as they both explore the various possibilities presented by pocket-sized lions or lion-sized pockets.
:) Glad to see a person as creative as yourself has this same idea. That kid’s lucky. :)